国外也有段子手：放弃阿根廷？他为阿根廷付出了一切

大家好，欢迎收看本期“段子手”！说句实话，今天小编是没有什么心情编段子的，梅西再次与冠军擦肩而过，赛后更是宣布退出国家队，不得不让人感叹造化弄人。不过栏目还是不能鸽，一起来看看歪果仁对比赛的吐槽吧！

【智利点球淘汰阿根廷获美洲杯冠军，梅西赛后宣布退出国家队】

Abdullah10(阿根廷球迷)：对于那些指责“梅西抛弃了阿根廷国家队”的人——看看终场哨响后的梅西吧，他并没有放弃阿根廷，相反，他为阿根廷付出了一切。(People who're saying "Messi's given up on Argentina" - watch him after the final whistle. That's not a man who gave up, he gave everything.)

Ray192(海法马卡比球迷)：还有那些说这届美洲杯是友谊赛的人，我只想说：看看球员们因为失利而流下的泪水吧，别只用一句话就否定了他们的努力。(For all the people calling this tournament a cash grab, a glorified friendly: tell that to the players crying over the result of this match. Don't insult their effort.)

gregandsteve(墨西哥球迷)：都tm赖智利。(You did this Chile)

Cupcake-Warrior(索马里球迷)：智利7-0没把你们全队踢退役，你就偷着乐吧。(You should be happy the entire Mexican squad didn't retire after that 7-0.)

MarauderHappy1(巴萨球迷)：今天的比赛我在现场。当梅西罚丢点球之后，罗梅罗和马斯切拉诺立即冲上来安慰他。但在接下来的点球大战中，梅西一直在焦急地踱步，时而用手抱头，时而像个胎儿一样蜷在地上……那时，最终的审判结果还没有来临。梅西的痛苦，不是你我所能想象的。(I was at the game today, and as soon as Messi missed and walked away Romero SPRINTED to give him some support and so did Masche. For the entire shootout, Messi was pacing around, holding his head in his hands, and at one point he just went into fetal position and stuck his head into the ground... and that was before Argentina even lost. I can't even imagine the pain he must be feeling right now.)

Rover47(皇马球迷)：梅西这个点球罚的挺好，布拉沃肯定扑不出来。(Messi making sure he placed it somewhere Bravo couldn't save it)

Phoenixx777(皇马球迷)：老马赛后肯定又要出来逼逼了。(Imagine the inevitable Maradona shit talking.)

2Braulio3(墨西哥球迷)：裁判真是乱吹，这场决赛简直就是阿根廷智利联队vs布鲁斯-威利斯。(This ref has ruined the final already. Its Argentina and Chile vs Bruce Willis)

toiletting(波兰球迷)：为了让比赛在收视率上击败权力的游戏大结局，裁判也是费尽了心思。(This ref knows this game is going to have to compete with Game of Thrones for the ratings. He's making the game spicy.)

(图)拉莫斯：我也想踢美洲杯！

LDog_LM(曼联球迷)：前几天是大不裂颠，今天就没西了。(From Brexit to Mexit)

Tson_92(曼联球迷)：2004年齐达内曾经宣布退出国家队，但两年之后的世界杯他再次回归。我相信梅西也会这样，他会在2018年复出，并带领阿根廷闯入世界杯决赛——————然后在决赛里因为头顶C罗被红牌罚下，葡萄牙最终在点球大战赢得胜利。(Zidane also retired in 2004 and came back 2 years later for the NT. I would not be surprised if Messi does the same, returning to the team in Russia for WC 2018, then heroically dragging it to the final then getting a red card for head-butting CR7. Portugal wins in the penalty shootout of course.)

【法国2-1逆转爱尔兰，博格巴送点，格子梅开二度】

Theultimatebr0(尤文球迷)：博格巴一定是故意xjbt，这样他就能留在尤文了~(Pogba is playing bad on purpose so he can stay at Juventus)

FlickMyKeane(爱尔兰球迷)：是时候摆起大巴了！(PARK THAT FUCKING CIE BUS)

IEatGee(爱尔兰球迷)：摆大巴？把他娘的瑞安航空的飞机摆过来！(PARK THAT FUCKING RYANAIR PLANE)

risckyranger(皇马球迷)：站在门前的兰道夫简直就像甘道夫一样：“你不能通过这里！”(Randolph was just like Gandalf, standing before the door, YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!)

celticeejit(爱尔兰球迷)：从积极的一面来看，虽然我们从欧洲杯出局了，至少我们还在欧盟里啊。(Well, on the bright side, at least we're still in the E.U.)

Dank_Raptor(北爱尔兰球迷)：我就想问一句，爱尔兰球迷回家了，谁来维护世界和平啊？(Who is going to promote world peace now?)

【波兰点球淘汰瑞士，沙奇里禁区外惊天倒钩】

Coolbreeze_coys(热刺球迷)：我。了。个。大。草。(WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK)

Mateokovacic16(克罗地亚球迷)：最佳进球！心疼魔笛和帕耶。(goal of the tournament. sorry modric and payet.)

English_Civil_War(英格兰球迷)：伊布是低配版沙奇里。(Ibra is a poor man's Shaqiri)

Friburger(克罗地亚球迷)：不说进球，沙奇里是我见过的最长方形的人类了。(Shaqiri is the most rectangular human I've ever seen.)

(图)扎卡和厄齐尔相继失点，阿森纳球迷是这样的……

gmurz(曼城球迷)：扎卡一定能完美地融入阿森纳。(Xhaka will fit right into Arsenal)

hauntedcorpse(波兰球迷)：我要卸载米利克…(Milik pls uninstall)

BeradedSwashbuckler(未知主队球迷)：欧洲杯的米利克就像是美洲杯的卡瓦尼。(Milik is to the Euros what Cavani was to Copa America.)

barongbord(波兰球迷)：本届欧洲杯我们丢的第一个球是一粒禁区外的倒钩，可以，这很波兰。(Of course the first goal we concede is a bicycle kick from the edge of the box)

【葡萄牙1-0绝杀克罗地亚，90分钟双方0射正】

Comehonoeface2(美国球迷)：我还花了20美元(折合35000英镑)C罗戴帽，我一定是疯了……(Can't believe I put $20 (about 35,000 pounds) on Ronaldo to score a hattrick...)

gmurz(曼城球迷)：这个比赛无聊的啊，我都想开始找工作了。(This game was so boring that I stopped procrastinating to look for a job.)

expectation18(葡萄牙球迷)：如果我们不能击败希腊，那就成为希腊！(If you cant beat Greece, become Greece.)

最后，让我们看看本场比赛的普通球迷与克罗地亚球迷看到进球一刻的反应：

(图)普通球迷

(图)克罗地亚球迷

也许您还喜欢: 世界杯直播 亚洲杯直播 欧洲杯直播 足球直播

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